Do-It-Yourself Everyday History
This unusual time of sheltering in place opens the way for something different. For now, the edges of our everyday worlds are smaller: the expanse of our residence, or an outdoor place where we can have some space. But creativity thrives in uncertainty. When our ability to venture wide is limited, we can shift our gazes to look deeper for treasure—right here where we are.
In my novel Everyday History, one of the main characters, Henry, writes articles to help him process his thoughts and feelings. The theme of the articles is a focus on one thing—usually a physical item, but sometimes a freighted concept—to tease out the deeper personal meanings that one thing encapsulates.
Readers of the novel have reached out to me about how much the idea of Henry’s Everyday History process appeals to them. In a meta move (Henry wrote a book that included ways to connect with others around the concept of Everyday History), I’d like to offer a simple way to connect deeper with the people you’re sheltering in place with (or with beloveds by phone or video call).
A Process for DIY Everyday History
Make Space – Set aside a block of time without distractions. An open-ended time frame could be handy, to make sure everyone has enough time to share. Or allot a time limit for each person’s turn.
Choose in Private – Before meeting together, every person participating goes off on their own to consider and choose one physical item to share about. Allow reflective time for this. Be thoughtful and honest when choosing. (Below are some questions to consider as you make your choice. )
Establish a Safe Space – We go deeper when we feel safer. Stating a few parameters, out loud, can set the tone for a positive outcome. For example: We’ll take turns. We’ll listen without interruption. Do whatever you need to do to create an atmosphere conducive to deeper sharing. If there’s a time limit for each person’s turn, agree on how to manage it.
Take Turns Sharing – Bring your items with you when you come together. One by one, tell about your item—why you chose it and what it means to you.
Record the Experience (Optional) – If everyone is comfortable doing so, you could record what you share with each other. Or you could write a piece about what you shared (check out these beautiful Everyday History articles written by LyricalKris).
Ask for a Story (A Variation) – A more casual or spontaneous way to get to know someone at a deeper level can be to ask them to tell you the story of an item in their life, especially an item they seem to treasure.
By the time you’re finished, you may have learned something new or surprising about the people in your life.
You blink, and the horizon expands.
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These questions may help with choosing an item and diving deeper when you share about it.
Question Prompts for Choosing and Sharing
How did you acquire this item?
Why did you keep it?
What journeys has it taken?
What was its story before it met you?
How has it helped you?
What dreams or wishes does it hold for you?
What do you love most about it?
What’s the story of your first meeting with this item?
What was an important moment in your history with this item?
What does this item represent to you?
Why do you want or need this in your life?
Who does this item connect you to?
What does this item mean to you?
Do you have an item no one else knows the meaning of?
Is there a secret story you’d like to share about an item?
Is there an item it would be a relief to share about?
Is there something you haven’t shared about before but you’d like to? If so, what's an item you have that could help you share?
Is there an item that would give you courage while you share something deep you haven’t talked about before?
Do you feel safe sharing about this? Or might you want to share with a different group or friend instead?
May you find courage and connection within the care you give yourself.
I’m interested in you and your Everyday History stories. You’re welcome to share them via the Contact page, which sends a private email to me.
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Alice Archer is the author of The Infinite Onion and Everyday History, thought-provoking romance novels for strong hearts. You can subscribe to her newsletter to receive a free story, notification of new articles and books, and more.
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